The journey and experience of becoming a widow is a challenging mountain to climb
with each woman having her own unique story. My story encompasses a tumultuous life until I fell in love with
my husband. We had a wonderful marriage until one early morning when my whole world was turned upside
down. My husband was killed in an accident on the way to work. No police came to my door, instead the
doctor from the hospital called to tell me that my husband was gone. I couldn't breathe and every inch of my
body was in pain. I was in my thirties. I could not imagine living without him and yet my three
daughters needed me. For me, they were my salvation. After living for so many days and weeks waiting
for him to come home, I finally started to think of survival and how I was going to accomplish it.
First, I had to find a better job to keep things afloat regarding bills and
providing for my family. My daughters were going to need everything in a parent from completing the bringing
up stage to education. My main objective was for them to feel safe, cared for, and most importantly to know
they were loved. Sometimes it was with great difficulty because of what I was feeling on a personal
level. The challenges were endless - the frustration of trying to find a tool to fix a broken faucet (with no
success) to dealing with the kids as I began dating.
Being a mother, a father and a friend were tough to balance, especially during the
teenage years but somehow it all worked out. I managed to get all three girls through college and I am proud
to say I have three wonderful loving daughters contributing to society.
My experiences with the kids, the house, the career, survival, dating and more
created a yearning to help others so that maybe their experience could be softened a bit with the sharing of my
lessons - I call them pearls of wisdom.
If each widow realizes it is okay to talk about death and discuss her inner most
fears, we then can rebuild ourselves to go forth with strength, hope, inner peace and happiness. My heart
goes out to each and every widow - know that you are not alone.